Something to Ponder

Lately I have found myself thinking about what my life might be like if I never have the opportunity to have children. I think of places Lee and I can travel to, things we can do, and the dream car that I have always wanted. I wouldn't need to save for a future mission or college education. I wouldn't need to worry about them making the wrong decisions and hoping I raised them the right way.


As I think about all those things, it still makes me sad. I don't care if I ever get my dream car, or go on that fancy vacation. I really want to be a Mom and I'm not ready to give up on that dream. I have evaluated my life and I have changed the things that I have been slacking on. I have humbled myself and admitted to my mistakes which have brought me to my knees in prayer asking for forgiveness. I have asked The Lord to help make me a stronger person to accept what He has in store for me. I don't know what that is yet, but no matter what it is, I pray that I can accept it. Even if it's not what I want.

We are given every trial for a purpose. This particular trial is an on going one, and one I will struggle with my whole life if I never have a child. I have learned so much so far and I hope I have made the Lord and my family proud. I hope I can continue to learn and grow as a result of this trial and look back on how I handled it with pride. Life is to short to worry about things I cannot change, So here's to a bright future no matter what it holds.